The Zen of being Me

Posted by Susan Russo on July 10, 2016

Blue skies smiling at me.

It’s not often that I relax. I mean truly relax. Sure, I go away often but there’s a decent amount of stress associated with those adventures. I’m either looking ahead or back thinking what I must do next or forgot to do first. You wouldn’t think it but I’m wound up pretty tight.
I’ve been working hard this year on “mindfulness”. It’s not just the latest catch word for me but rather a path to stress reduction and enjoyment. I actively practice every day and I think it’s paying off. Sharing space with up to 13 of my people on some days may not facilitate my peaceful easy feeling but I have been mostly in the Zen zone. It’s a good place to hang out.

Spike ball –
definitely not in my zen zone.

Of course my family members are experts at trying to throw chinks into my chi. They make me learn to play something called ‘spike ball’ which is sort of like playing volleyball with a trampoline. My competitive nature has me leaping my 57 year old self over the net in an attempt to do bodily harm. It doesn’t help that my 10 year old partner looks at me in disgust and says, “Why didn’t you get that?”

My unforgiving spike ball partner.

Despite my loss in spike ball I was able to regain my composure and continue on my path to enlightenment.

Folly, thy name is “Spike”

We had never spent July 4th at the beach before and it was something I’ve wanted to do for quite some time. It was kind of magical seeing the fireworks juxtaposed with the luminescence of the surf at night. I was really feeling at one with the universe. Then the boys decided that instead of watching the sky for the rockets red glare they were more interested in finding ghost crabs. This evolved into them creating a gladiator coliseum out of sand. The combatant crabs were given Roman names and tossed into the pit to battle. When a limb was lost a winner was declared and the gladiators were released. Did this blood lust and screaming diminish my tranquility? Not a chance. I am immune to their violent natures. (Perhaps all the times I threatened to rip their arms off and beat them with the bloody stumps contributed somewhat?)

Happy 4th!

Conquest at the Crabaseum –
“We who are about to die salute you!”

I didn’t even chance transgressing my transcendence when invited to play “Risk”. I actually had to leave the room because as it became apparent that Kim would be victorious over all the Russo males (who couldn’t for the life of them work cooperatively to defeat her) there was so much yelling and screaming that the 5 part television series on the O.J. Simpson trial provided a more peaceful interlude.

“Play Risk. It’ll be fun!”

“I beat all you idiots!”

The ocean was even cooperative with my calm. In the 30 years I’ve been traveling to the Outer Banks I can honestly say that the sea was never so calm, clear and blue.

Amazingly calm seas

“Where’s my waves?”

I found enjoyment in transforming the kids into sea creatures and watching them dig in the sand.

DSCN2092 (2) DSCN2107 (2) DSCN2111

I have found that when you are at peace with the world it is also at peace with you. Don & I like to walk in the early morning while at the beach. We trekked down the beach road then through some side streets so I can indulge my other passions for architecture and landscaping.

Crazy crap you see at the beach.

How to landscape with sand.

Sipping rum in the morning makes you a pirate instead of a drunk.

We visited the Winks Market twice while on our sojourns. An Outer Banks landmark since 1957, this was one of the only markets that stayed open year round. The first time we entered the gentleman manning the register took notice of Don’s USS JFK hat. He reached under the drawer in his cash register and produced a patch that was in the shape of a star. He told Don that these patches were made from retired USA flags and gave him one for his hat. He thanked Don for his service. Such a sweet, simple gesture. On our next to last morning we were running out of coffee and wanted to save it for our kids. We took a walk down to Winks to procure two cups. On this day a woman was working there. We were the only folks in the store and she offered to make us fresh coffee. I explained that Don actually prefers it when the dregs have been cooking a while. It’s the Navy way. She said that she had a friend who was in the Navy and also made very strong coffee and she preferred it that way. We poured our coffees and brought the cups to the register. She told us the coffees were on her and also thanked Don for his service. If you visit the Outer Banks in the Kitty Hawk area please go patronize this store.

The Winks Market flying all the flags of our armed service branches.

I had a conversation with my BFF, Becky, while at the beach. She had seen some of the photos we posted and she commented that she had never seen me look so relaxed. It was telling that this person who knows me so well could sense my calm. Even the beach traffic while we headed home didn’t seem to disrupt me.

Now I have been back home for a day. I can feel the tightness in my shoulders. This is the area where I hold all my stress. I have unpacked, done laundry, gone shopping, tended to my garden (which is in amazing shape – kudos to Darren Russo!), scheduled appointments, started packing for next weekend (my bestie’s son is getting married!) and generally tended to the necessities of life. I can honestly say that I am not as relaxed as I was but I can still recall the feeling when I am still and allow it to wash over me like the waves.